Lake Berryessa to be filled with Cabernet Sauvignon for Jeff Bezos visit

Over the next four months, Lake Berryessa, the 1.6 million acre foot reservoir that provides recreation and hydroelectricity to Napa County, will be drained of water and filled with prestigious Napa Cabernet Sauvignon. Soon after Jeff Bezos, the billionaire businessman who founded Amazon, stated that he would be making a summertime visit to the Napa Valley, the Bureau of Reclamation reported the plans for total fluid exchange.

“This is an exciting chapter in the history of this Great Lake,” said Naomi Hernandez, president of the Berryessa Tourism Accountability Group. “First, all water will be jettisoned into Solano County over the course of two days. Next, only the highest quality back-vintages from the finest Napa Valley wineries will be gently pumped in over the next two months, perfectly aerating and opening up the bouquet of the wine lake.

Hernandez went on to say that “Berryessa Sauvignon” would be off-limits while Mr. Bezos was enjoying his Napa Valley vacation of wine jet-skiing, wine scuba-diving and drink-foiling.

The amount of delicious Napa Valley Cabernet Sauvignon should reach right up to the glory hole, and should any overflow, “what is Solano County going to do, complain?” Hernandez quipped.

When asked if this would be a 100% varietal lake or a blend, Hernandez was quick to respond, “Mr. Bezos has made it clear that his standards require only the finest Cabernet Sauvignon. Absolutely no Carneros Merlot was specified in the contract.”

The fish from Lake Berryessa will be relocated to Lake Hennessy, unless Mr. Bezos feels the need to wine-ski on Chardonnay.